Quotes About Humor

If I have to write by a certain time, I can pull through, but usually I just let stuff happen, hanging out with comic friends - or bringing a basic idea on stage and seeing if it goes anywhere.

Jason Lee made me laugh all the time because he's so big, and I love how goofy bodies can be.

After that, anytime she caught me near a kitchen she'd start in on me. So I have an automatic sphincter clench any time I reach for a pan. (Devyn)

You don't call Acheron 'babe.' (Valerius) You don't call Acheron 'babe' because...well, that's just sick. But I call him 'babe' all the time. (Tabitha)

Any time you need an expert parental hand- (Zarek) I'll find Jericho. (Astrid) Um, could you at least wait until that thing's housebroken? (Jericho)

I like comedy. I would love to do comedy for a long time.

My little boy Sonny makes me laugh all the time. He has good comedic timing.

brb, ttyl ok? wow, i saved a 'ton' of time with those acronyms.

Comedians dissect jokes all the time. Comedians are beautiful structuralists. But ultimately it's an athletic endeavor.

I hope people'll find out pretty quickly that the guy they saw for 10 years was my sense of humor the whole time.

Trust, a sense of humor, and don't let the sun go down on an argument without trying to make it up. That's all I know about good marriage. I've been married a long time - it seems to be working.

Taste in comedy, like fashion, changes all the time.

Comedians don't get Oscars, so I gave up on that a long time ago. And I can't really speak about the Oscar-worthiness of my own performance.

If bad taste were a felony, every writer I know would've done prison time.

Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug.

My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me.

One time, my mother told me that I always eat like I'll never see food again. And I said, "I won't unless I bring it home." That shut her up.

I'm having a difficult time killing my parents

I dont spend much time on Twitter. I joined because I found it funny.

Why do I get the feeling that if you give me a hard time, I'll tell all of our year-mates your family nickname is Meathead?

Every time i try and wink at someone, I mess it up and end up scaring people.

When it's time to stop living, I will certainly make Death my number one choice!

That, lad," he said proudly, "was some of the worst poetry I have heard for a long time. It was offensive to the ear and a torrrture to the soul....We'll make a gonnagle out of ye yet!

I'm not serious most of the time.