Quotes from Will Rogers

If stupidity got us in this mess, how come it can't get us out.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.

The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.

If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket.

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

Ten men in our country could buy the whole world and ten million can't buy enough to eat.

The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.

It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation, but you can lose it in a minute.

An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh.

You know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're actually paying for.

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

The problem ain't what people know. It's what people know that ain't so that's the problem.

Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.

What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.

If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?

There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to play with matches.

Most men are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.

There is no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago.