Quotes from Garrison Keillor

I'm of an age when if I started to do eulogies, I'd be doing nothing else. You don't want to be remembered? I don't want them to be told to remember me.

A romp in the hay lingers like the first line of a song but your true love is the one you make a life with and write more than a line about you write a whole book.

A minister has to be able to read a clock. At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast and get the peas out of the freezer.

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have.

I write for a radio show that, no matter what, will go on the air Saturday at five o'clock central time. You learn to write toward that deadline, to let the adrenaline pick you up on Friday morning and carry you through, to cook up a monologue about Lake Wobegon and get to the theater on time.

Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.

You don't have to justify a beautiful stroke of good luck. Accept it. Smile and say thank you.

Marriage, friends, is a lifelong feast; love is no light lunch.

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people. Lacking any other purpose in life, it would be good enough to live for their sake.

When it comes to finding available men in Minnesota, the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

The mass of men lead lives of shallow happiness; the superior man exults in his gloom.

Most men are prisoners at best, Who some strong habit every drag about Like chain and ball.

A man can't eat anger for breakfast and sleep with it at night and not suffer damage to his soul.

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever.

Your life is a work of art, and in the end, the underlying theme of great art is bravery and hope and love.

You've got work to do. Don't put this off. And don't take the long view, here. You know? Life is today and tomorrow and - and if you're lucky, next week.

God is a great humorist. He just has a slow audience to work with.

I don't have a great eye for detail. I leave blanks in all of my stories. I leave out all detail, which leaves the reader to fill in something better.

A book is a gift you can open again and again.

Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough. Thank you for the rain. And for the chance to wake up in three hours and go fishing: I thank you for that now, because I won't feel so thankful then.

"Thank you, dear God, for this good life, and forgive us if we do not love it enough."

I think that you are only obliged to be a humorist from the age of 18 until you turn 30. Past the age of 30 I don't think there is any obligation to be clever at all.

Not everyone has a Life's Work. Some people simply have a Life.

I don't associate work with feelings of satisfaction. Rather, guilt, frustration, and resentment of people who write better than I do.