Quotes from Groucho Marx

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it...

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

Pij?, by uczyni? ludzi bardziej interesuj?cym.

Goodreads.com is where introverts unite.

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

În spatele oric?rui b?rbat de succes se afl? o femeie, iar in spatele ei se afl? soÅ£ia b?rbatului.

That's three quotes? Add another quote and make it a gallon.

I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.

Whatever it is, I'm against it.

I don't want to belong to any club that would have me as a member.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

Por el mero hecho de existir la gente se cree con derecho a ser feliz.

This is a GALA day for you. Answer: Well, a GAL a day is enough for me!

If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.

You know, I would buy you a parachute if I thought it wouldn't open.

Scientists make these deductions by examining a rat, or your landlord who won't cut the rent, and what do they find? Asparagus.

In verità io sono uno studente invecchiato che ambisce alla conoscenza e alla solitudine, e conduco vita esemplare e sedentaria in un'atmosfera libresca e claustrale

Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early age.

Who you gonna believe, me or your lying eyes?

I would not join any club which would have me be a member.

Es mejor estar callado y parecer tonto, que hablar y despejar las dudas definitivamente.

Who says Television isn't educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.

1 Ensayo sobre las ventajas de dormir solo* * Nota del Editor: El autor decidió dejar en blanco este capítulo.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.